Saturday, April 02, 2005

Quote of the Day: "Dong whallop! *crushes a car*" - Me

So Gloria and I switched places for a little while. I tell you, she wears really comfortable underwear.  

You really have no idea how hard it is to type through a blanket of naked women. I think I'm hitting R or L, but I'm really tapping off a whole lotta O's. *Rimshot.*

Combine that with a rich, luxurient fug of cigar smoke, and it's fucking impossible ... for the mere mortal, that is. No one mentions this, but ninjas have a second layer of eyelids. Blast me with all the mace you want, officer, it ain't gonna do diddly. Nada. Zippo. Fly fucking speck. Then I'm going to rip out your spleen with my teeth. Then we'll see who has unpaid tickets.

One moment.

*Snaps a pirate's neck*

Holy SHIT, I love llamas. And Crackhead. And monkeypox. And being hung like a white rhino. Bacon rod ambush! *double-slaps a Frenchman* Crotch rocket offensive! *splits oak table* Dungula bone punch! *upsets nunnery* Tickle pickle blitz! *destroys an emu* Spoo shooter skirmish! *levels Libya*

Well, that's all I got for today. Not that I'm tired, I just should go before Gloria sees what kind of mess I left here. Later, bitches. The Sinja, out.


*Back-spiral-flips out the window*

posted at 9:48:30 pm

Dr. God
April 28, 2005   03:33 PM PDT
I laughed my ass off. Seriously...where did it go?
Sinister Ninja
April 20, 2005   12:48 AM PDT
No one even UNDERSTANDS how funny this is. Well, maybe three of us.
April 4, 2005   12:59 PM PDT
Why does everyone steal my schtick? Leveling Libya? Killing emus? Sheesh. And this whole thing about hating everything, Goth.. that's gotta go. I mean, hate yourself all you want, because I hate you too. Just shut up about it, already.
April 3, 2005   11:03 PM PDT
April 3, 2005   10:11 PM PDT
April 3, 2005   06:33 PM PDT
I hate it. I hate everything, blehh.
April 3, 2005   12:32 AM PST
:-| wtf
April 2, 2005   11:17 PM PST
I'm printing this and framing it in gold! You two are **fantastic!!!!**
April 2, 2005   10:40 PM PST
uh huh.

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Glo'ri'a'na, noun:
1. An alternative form of "Gloria."
2. As "Americana" defines itself as artefacts of American culture, "Gloriana" consists of the artefacts of my culture.


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